Listen To Women

By Susan Bergeron

Tara Reade is my arch nemesis right now and she doesn't even know me. But I know her. I know this kind of publicity-seeking, manipulative, opportunist. I could smell the scent of mendacity on her a year ago when she started her smear campaign against Joe Biden. I've followed Joe's career for 45 years, watched him perform honorably in the White House for eight of them, and spent a year of my life trying to help get him elected to president. Even so, if I believed there was the possibility of any truth in the things she accuses him of, I would have dropped the man like a rock and run. On no planet do I see this gentle man, who wrote the Violence Against Women Act, who wrote "Promise Me, Dad," being capable of throwing a woman up against a wall and jamming his paw up her skirt. I call her my enemy because she is trying to undermine the hard work of thousands of campaign workers who are trying to save this country from the disastrous collapse caused by the inept policies of the madman currently in the White House. Before embellishing it, her originalcompaint was that Biden touched her shoulders and touched her hair. Reade has stated she wants Joe Biden to resign his candidacy. So is she saying we should allow criminal Trump, a pathological liar, to continue to kill possibly hundreds of thousands of helpless Americans through his incompetence? Because that's what happens if you get your way, Tara Reade. All the other candidates are either out of money or out of time. Even Sanders has dropped the mic. Biden is the only possible person left to stop the carnage. Does she really believe all Americans should suffer because she claims he violated her personal space and made her feel "uncomfortable" 17 years ago?? It is interesting to note that her lawyer, Douglas Wigdor, who just dropped her, has donated over $50,000 to Trump's campaign.

Let's talk about "Believe Women" for just a bit. Those who oppose Reade have often been branded a hypocrite and responsible for tarnishing the #MeToo movement, but let me say this: The slogan "Believe Women" was flawed from the outset. It should have been "LISTEN to women." Why should anyoneget the benefit of belief simply because they say something? It's ludicrous. I do recognize that the intent was to stop the practice of ignoring rape and assault complaints from women, and dismissing them as revenge complaints or attempts to cover up embarrassing consensual sex. And, admittedly, that has been a huge problem; rape kits have been found languishing in police evidence lockers, abandoned for years, as the women's cases went unheard. So ALL women should be given an audience, no matter who they are---even the most hardened felons who get viciously raped in prison, where they're supposed to be protected, deserve to have a listen, no matter what the crime they're serving time for. But what does it mean to listen?

When a woman (or man, for that matter) levels such a serious charge, the burden of proof is NOT on the accused; the accuser must offer as much proof as possible. Granted, it's not always easy. Abusers often have a way of cleverly hiding their actions. Usually, there are no witnesses, so the first line of defense for the victim is to report the crime to the police. There needs to be an official record of the incident. It is essential to make a written, dated, signed contemporaneous statement and store it in a safe place, in addition to any statement given to police. Police records and rape kits have a way of getting lost.

People often ask Why didn't she say something when it happened? Sometimes victims will emerge with their stories decades later. The people who ask this obviously have never experienced the horror of rape or assault. There are so many reasons! Fear would be chief among them. The attackers, almost without exception, threaten to come back and kill their victims, or harm or kill their family members. The worse the attack, the more believable the threat. Then there's the embarrassment of being dragged through the court system, of enduring "victim blaming"---What were you wearing on the night of the attack? Had you been drinking? How many men have you been intimate with before?  To stand before the court in front of your family and strangers and truthfully answer these questions can be painful and they fear for their reputations and even the possible loss of their jobs. And then there's the little problem of having to sit there and face that monster who attacked them, beat them, violated them, raped them. And what if the prosecutor botches the case and the perp goes free? That'swhy they don't report.

I understand their decision on a deep and personal level. And I respect the choice of all victims of assault and rape, whichever path they feel they must choose in the interest of their own self-preservation. But they must understand this: Their choice does have consequences. Once they leave the evidence behind and decide to eschew reporting an assault to the police, a choice to change their mind later will always be questioned, and it will become more difficult to prove their accusation as each day goes by. Something else that's probably even more important to consider: If you don't speak up and report a violent act against you, you run the risk of being complicit in the continuation of the behavior of the perpetrator against others in the future. Sadly, violators almost never commit their crimes in a vacuum, they're habitual offenders, often generational perpetrators. Crime statistics prove this out. Victims: you do what you have to do to stay alive and survive the horror of your experience, but know this: You may be haunted for the rest of your life that you may have let other innocents be harmed because you kept silent.

Where are the other victims of Joe Biden? There are none. They have not come out of the shadows, as in the case of Donald Trump's dozens of victims, or Justice Brett Kavanaugh's victims; Justice Kavanaugh was allegedly a former frat boy of questionable character, who's drunken exploits involved the alleged violation of multiple women. There's another "what about-ism" that Trump's minions love to hand over to Reade: From the right wing there comes a constant bleating of "What about Christine Blasey Ford?" Nice try. First off, in 1986 Dr. Ford was a teenager and claims she was scared of getting caught by her parents for being at a party where she didn't belong and that's why she never reported the alleged assault by Kavanaugh. Today Dr. Ford is a soft-spoken and scholarly woman of impeccable reputation. She didn't keep changing her story and she didn't try to pitch her "bombshell" story to Kavanaugh"s competition. Conversely, Reade had attempted to engage Senators Liz Warren and Kamala Harris in using her assault story to discredit their opponent, Joe Biden, during the early days of the Democratic Primary. Both candidates ran from her, as well they should have. Like many others, they smelled the stench of chum rotting on the dock as soon as Reade approached. Dr. Ford stated her motivation was that she thought the American people had a right to know that someone about to be elevated to a lifetime position on the Supreme Court was a man of inherently poor character. She was not seeking publicity. In fact, she attempted to remain annonymous. Other alleged victims of Kavanaugh came forward, after the bravery that was shown by Christine Blasey Ford. It was the GOP that blocked a fullsome and detailed FBI investigation of the matter in their haste to shove yet another hard right conservative onto the bench. And what happened during the Senate confirmation hearings when Kavanaugh was asked, directly, if he would agree to an FBI investigation of the matter? He refused to answer. He knew his new boss was watching his every move on the 70" TV screen from inside the West Wing. Joe Biden has agreed to all investigative measures involving Reade's allegations. He's answered them forthrightly, denies them, and appears to be honest. How come this affair never came up during the vetting process for Vice President under Barrack Obama? Why did Reade continue to be a Biden supporter for years after the alleged incident? It sounds to me like she liked Biden---until she figured out a way to make some money off of him. 

Not lost on me, is that at no time has VP Biden attempted to denigrate Ms. Reade. This is in  sharp contrast to the tearful outbursts, the scathing, violent partisan rantings about conspiracy theories and other shameful behavior displayed by Judge Kavanaugh on the floor of the U.S. Senate during his confirmation hearings---this from a man seeking a lifetime position that requires sober impartial judgement often involving life and death decisions. In contrast, VP Biden agreed that all women deserve to be listened to.  He recognizes his accuser's right, for whatever reasons, to level her charges. Unlike Kavanaugh, Biden has called for a full investigation. Some ask Why, then, won't he release his donated archives from the University of Delaware? He's explained that: He knows that information would be combed through by his political opponents in an attempt to use it, (in yet another unfair advantage) for oppo research, and he explained that the records of any complaints filed against him would not be found there, anyway. He's not hiding the ball at the University of Delaware, folks. He's told us right where to look: the Library of Congress. He's not afraid of what's there because he knows he's innocent.

Recently, former multiple landlords of Ms. Reade have come forward to reveal that she stiffed them repeatedly. In one case, she was boarding her horse and abandoned the animal with the keeper, leaving him to pay all the feed bills. In another case she stiffed a horse farm owner with a rather substantial vet bill. In every account, the accusers claimed she showed no remorse and no attempt to make restitution. My sister had a horse boarding business for years. I remember her stories of such people sticking her with the bills and leaving her family with the choice of letting the animal starve or using their own funds to care for the irresponsible deadbeat's animal. Someone who hasn't the means has no business engaging in such an expensive hobby, knowing that great care, money and effort is reguired in owning such animals. So when I read that allegation, again, it touched me on a personal level. This speaks to the extreme disregard for other people and the lack of compassion for helpless animals. Again, I must reject the notion that Tara Reade is a hapless victim. 

So what does Tara Reade really want? She has stated emphatically that she wants Joe Biden to resign. After being a champion of the man for so many years, why this now? It is curious. It does beg the question Is she being politically and/or financially motivated by the opposition? She does have a long history of financial problems. Does she simply feel forgotten by the world?---someone seeking attention? She's certainly gotten lots of that of late. But Reade had her chance, if anything improper happened, 17 years ago, and if so, she let the time and opportunity to speak up pass. She's welcome to do it now. But, like I said, there are consequences. We will listen. But we may not believe. I, for one, most definately don't believe her.