Wishful Thinking

I would really love it if the old bromide about being careful what you wish for because it might come true was in itself true because I have several wishes directed directly against Donald Trump.

The first regards his upcoming interview with Robert Mueller – if as usual he doesn’t follow the advice of everybody on the Trump team that he’d be a fool to go ahead with it.

I wish that Trump thinks he’s slick enough – a “stable genius,” remember? – to go head-to-head with Mueller et al without even a lawyer by his side. He can lie all he wants during his normal five or six lies a day routine, but when you lie under oath to a special counsel, that is called perjury and it is still a felony, even for stable geniuses, and can result in jail time.

And in this case would most likely be the end of his presidency because even his erstwhile Republican supporters would concede that a felon can’t be president. His base would scream and holler but -- so what? – a crime is a crime.

Now another Muller-related wish I have is that Trump is totally unhappy and totally over his head as president and would like to find a way out. What better way than to lie to Mueller and get bounced and then scream and holler along with his base that he was railroaded by the stinking Democrats and, of course, the “fake news” and its media perpetrators who have been out to get him from day one. In Trump’s slanted worldview, there would be some kind of warped honor in this act of political suicide. It would also get him back to the golden embraces of his beloved Trump Tower and away from all the unpleasantness of being the president in that shithole of a White House.

I’m only limited myself to three wishes here, because that is all you usually get in fairy tales and such, and I don’t want to color outside the lines.

So Melania skipped Davos and took off for the sunny shores of Palm Beach while Donnie was the toast of Davos except when he got booed for trotting out all that old “fake news” bullshit that even the richies at the Swiss conclave are obviously sick of.

So there’s Melania in Florida and then when Donnie is back in the White House she’s still there and there’s been nothing from her all the while.

And then – out of the not so blue – she issues a statement that she’s filing for divorce on the grounds of his cheating with everybody in sight and  that he even has a current girlfriend. And she has the goods to back up these claims and they’ll be in the divorce papers that are being filed as she speaks through her press release.

The jamboree is on! Every news outlet in the known universe is piling on! The White House is as silent as a tomb. The Republican party’s reaction is a very loud and echoing gulp. The Christian right is wearing out their Bibles looking for a way out for their hero.

You can’t call your own wife – or soon-to-be-ex-wife – fake news, bro. And there’ll be no question about who gets Barron.

Ah, if only wishes could come true.